Hello World

Hello world, I'm out! 3 days earlier than my EDD - estimated due date. This is me, after they bathed me after birth.

And this is me, at my home sweet home the very next day.

And you know what, I already know how to suck my thumb right after I'm out. Don't believe? Here's my picture, hehe.

Oh, by the way, this has nothing to do with SK, but my name is Wong Sherman, ta-daa! 

Mum and dad were still very undecided about my name few months ago, but one night, they were all watching Sherman & Peabody on Astro, and Kenzie korkor suddenly said 'I love Sherman', and so, Sherman it is!

Ok bye! Shall update you guys again :)

She Goes Today

It's her last day today.

I am talking about the daytime lady who helps me with my confinement. She comes in the morning and leaves after her chores are done. I mentioned 9am-6pm, she comes 9.20am and leaves at 5pm.

There goes my RM2k+RM100 angpau. Like 'money dropped into the sea' (wasted, in Chinese proverb).

She is good for nothing except cooking (and helping me to bathe Gavin once a day) only. I feel she cannot and did not help me much for the past 1 month. I stopped asking her to boil my bath water (ginger+serai) after 2 weeks and I never requested her to handwash my clothes and baby Gavin's.

I still did everything myself in the morning - all before she comes. I vacumn the house, mop the floor, change bedsheets, wash clothes, hang clothes, change baby Gavin and feed baby Gavin.

If I did not have her, I could just boil my own dates drink and herbal soup (and eat with rice) myself. Easy peasy. Only no proper gingery confinement food, that's all. I've broken all the rules of confinement from day 1, I bathe 5 times a day and wash my hair 2 times a day. So, confinement food or not, is already nothing to me at this point. Or should I say, having a confinement helper or not, is already not important to me. I can manage the baby, the house and even cook a simple dinner for my hubby when he comes back from work.

Anyway here is how she looks like everyday from 12pm onwards. She will laze on the couch like this until 4pm. Wipe baby Gavin's body at 4pm, cook dinner, speed-mop the floor with plain water after that and leaves at (or before) 5pm.

Counting Down

No, I'm not counting down the days for my confinement to be over. I'm counting down the days for the lady to leave! I can't wait for that day. I can't wait for her to leave! It's very eyesore for me when:

1) She eats non-stop my food from morning til evening. She helps herself to breakfast, sits comfortably at my dining table, makes coffee and treats my house like a hotel which offers free food (I did not know I need to provide her breakfast and tea, I thought just lunch)

2) She comfortably takes food from the fridge without asking my permission on whether that can be eaten (although I mentioned before she can eat anything in the house, I still prefer she asks first instead of just taking it freely like this is her own house (because certain food are in containers cooked by my mil/mum and those food are meant to be for me and hubby)

3) She is so free and has nothing to do from 12.30pm til 4pm everyday. She lazes on the couch like a corpse during that time but knows how to get up from her corpse position at 3pm to make her teatime food. It makes me feel my money is not worth it

4) She sits on my bed or her body touches my bed when she carries baby to the bed or when she comes in to check on baby. I have mild OCD and because of this I wash my bedsheets once every two days. She can come in to check on baby but please don't sit on my bed (and sometimes with feet up) and treat like it's your own house. I very don't like!

5) She dirties my kitchen and causes ants to come. My kitchen has so many ants everywhere ever since she came. She pre-fried ginger, garlic and ikan bilis in advance and store them in containers so that she doesn't have to prepare them each time she needs to use them. I don't mind this 'convenient' method of hers but because of the smell and oily containers, it has attracted the ants to come. I hate the sight of ants and I get so stressed!

6) She keeps saying "baby wants to eat" whenever he makes a single noise. Usually I would wait a while to see if he really wants to feed but most of the time he will sleep again after making some noise. I just can't stand it when she walks in like a zombie and says "baby wants to eat". Get lost, woman!

7) She really has nothing much to do and I am beginning to wonder was it a mistake hiring her or was I too independent? Without her, I could do everything myself (except cooking proper confinement food). I mean, come on, I wash clothes+hang clothes+vacumn+mop+bathe Kz+prepares Kz's breakfast and feed him+feed baby Gavin+change baby Gavin - all before she comes! Do I that need her?

8) She reaches at 9.20am in the morning and can't wait to leave before 5pm. Again yes, I can't wait for her to leave each day and I am more than happy to open the door for her to leave, but at the same time I am paying her RM2k, I feel she is not worth the price

9) She spoiled my bathroom shower hose

10) She does not do any housework except cincai mop the floor with plain water after she cooks

What can I do? Nothing. I could just wait she leaves as soon as possible, that's all. And get over it.

Lesson learnt: Go stay at a confinement centre if you have OCD, independent and still do housework everyday (coz you will feel you can still survive without the cl), don't like strangers in your house, don't like people dirtying the kitchen and causes ants to come and lastly, if you can afford. Confinement centres cost RM6k including meals. In my situation I am paying this daytime lady RM2k. Herbs (soups+dates drink) cost about RM600. Food (meat and vege) cost about RM500 (including stuffs like Bentong ginger, yellow wine). So you do the Maths. I save half of the market price (not yet included gas+electricity bills) but I don't get help during night time and still have to do housework.

My Day

Just to write about my typical day during confinement.

5 or 5.30 - Usually baby Gavin will feed at this time. After that, I will change his diapers.

7.00 - Wakeup, boil water, breakfast (usually bread with butter and cheese or peanut butter with jam and a cup of hot milk with milo/vico). Will drag time and wait for hubby to send Kz to nanny's and go to work as I could not do any housework with them around

7.20 - Start doing housework: Vacumn (of course I will close Gavin's bedroom door), mop floor, change bedsheets (call me OCD, I change them once every 2-3 days), put on back new bedsheets, change floor towels, dish towels and bath towels (once every few days), wash clothes (using washing machine of course), bathe and wash hair, hang clothes and I am about done

8.15 - Rest, feed baby Gavin if there is a need, dry mop the floor (using 'magic mop') and continue to laze around while waiting for that lady to arrive

9.00 - Pump breast milk

9.15 (or later) - Lady arrives

10.30 - Lady bathes baby Gavin

11.00 - Lady prepares my lunch

11.45 - I will bathe again after lunch

12.30 - 15.30 - I will rest and play with the hp/tablet. Lady cooks her lunch, then lazes on the sofa like a corpse or play with her hp. At 3pm she will get up from her corpse position and make tea

15.30 or 16.00 - Lady wipes baby Gavin's body

16.30 - Lady prepares dinner

16.45 - Lady leaves (sometimes when there is work undone she stays til 5++)

18.30 - Hubby comes back from work, picks up Kz from the nanny's and have dinner

20.00 - 21.30 - We watch tv, hubby plays with baby Gavin and Kenzie

22.00 - Bed time (for me). I sleep with baby Gavin and take care of him every night, waking up every 2.5-3 hours or so to feed and change him and the cycle repeats the whole night.

My Confinement Story

Now, many will critisize or object strongly to what I am about to write. If you do not like what I am about to write, either click the x button on top or shut up if you want to continue reading.

As an introduction let me tell you that I did not hire a full time confinement lady (cl). I hired a daytime lady who comes from 9am and leaves at 5pm (well, I said 6pm initially but I also mentioned the word flexible, means she could leave after her chores are finished, and she really leaves at 5pm everyday!)

Anyway I hired a daytime lady because I know I will break the rules especially on bathing and washing hair issues. If I hire a fulltime cl and not following the rules, my money will be wasted. So with a daytime lady, as long as she cooks proper food for me and takes care of the baby, I don't feel so guilty breaking the 'touch water' rules. Plus I don't like strangers sleeping over in my house. I can still walk around, naked with just my disposble pantist (and pad) on. I pump my breast milk and latch baby naked, by the way.

Anyway, enough about the introduction. I am about to write about breaking all the rules confinement. So please shut up if you want to read.

The Broken Rules
I delivered my baby boy on 10th April. I was discharged and came home the next day, 11th April. Called the lady on 10th morning and she said she will come tomorrow. But in the evening after I delivered she called and said she could only make it on the 12th. I had no choice but to agree. What do you want me to say? Get lost and don't come? Already bad impression even before she arrives.

When I reached home I had to shower and wash my hair as there were still traces of dried blood sticking on my body, legs, feet, etc. All these blood was from the delivery process. So rule #1 broken: I showered and washed my hair 1 day after I delivered.

I shower everyday for about 5-6 times a day and I wash my hair twice a day. The weather was really hot and I don't want to add more stress to myself. I want to be able to take care of my baby happily without anyone controlling me.

I do housework everyday. I wash clothes (using washing machine of course), hang clothes, vacumn the house, mop the floor·, change bedsheets and wash the toilet. Of course hubby does housework also but I still do it again after that, yes, I have mild OCD.

Since the lady was unable to turn up on the day I was discharged, both my hubby and I did everything by ourselves. He boiled ginger water for my bath and boiled soup for me. I took care of baby the whole night. I made milk, changed diapers, washed bottles, etc. So you tell me, how not to touch water? And I passed through the most critical time alone, without anyone's help (hubby was snoring whole night while I handled the newborn alone). Do I still very need the lady? Can I ask her no need to come already?

The Lady
The lady turned up at my doorstep on 12th April. During the first few days, she was ok. But after that I am beginning not to like her. Everyday she can't wait to leave by 5pm. She cooks my lunch at 10-ish in the morning and my dinner at 4-ish in the afternoon. Why? So that her job will be done fast and she can leave after she washes my plates.

Everyday by 12.30pm til 4pm she will laze on the sofa like a corpse or play with her hp. Baby is good as he only zzzz whole day without giving work to the lady, but still, she can make herself useful and not letting me see her so free right?

She is like a hungry ghost and she eats anything and everything in the house non stop, some without my permission. In the morning she eats maggi mee with egg, hotdog or anything she finds in the fridge. After that she drinks kopi and eats some biscuits. Then during lunch she eats noodles and later another cup of kopi,and perhaps 3 slices of bread with cheese. She takes food without my permission - mil gave us some food for hubby's dinner. The lady takes the food and eats with her maggi mee without my permission. How daring is that?

She is really very free with not much work to do. I did not request her to handwash mummy's and baby's clothes by the way. And I did not request for baby to wear cloth diapers as my condo has no space and sunlight to hang so many cloth diapers in a day. Is she lucky to be hired by me? I offered RM2k.

The Food
The only thing good about her is that cooks well, that's all. I request for noodles everyday. No rice. She complied and managed to whip up food that can go down on my throat.

Gingery porky soupy confinement food with sesame oil and wine